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The answers were split down the middle.


A lot of men out there think women are lying when they announce they just want a nice guy.

A lot of men also want to be Batman. Neither Bruce Wayne nor Batman are exactly nice guys. Prevailing thought among single men is that every girl secretly wants to bang some motorcycle gang leader who looks like James Franco and treats us like crap — especially in public, to show their alpha side. Correlation never means causation. Or beating her?

What she really means when she says she wants a “nice guy”

Girls date assholes for a simple reason — they pretend to be nice guys for the first few months. They might treat everyone else like crap, but not her. She sees his soft side, and thinks everything will be okay. In a world full of dominance hierarchies, this is what happens.

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Girls date assholes for a simple reason — they hide their real personality. Many of the girls I know have chased down nice guys in high school hallways and bars. What the hell do they want?

They pursue inappropriate partners and unavailable women. They set themselves up for rejection. We live in endless overlapping global villages. We live in a world where an omega can slide out of the womb into a wealthy family, work out a lot, and learn conversation skills.

5 reasons why women don’t go for nice guys

So WTF with this alpha male crap in dating advice? We have eons of technology, schooling, and cultural expectations that overlay what we consider our biological impulsions. We have kink and fetish. Reproduction is no longer the endgame for everyone.

So the idea of an alpha male in the 21st century is utter bullshit. We live in a world far different from our ancestors. At best they want the illusion of one, based on legacy software.

The new nice guy: how to date and be decent in

We all just want to be loved, by someone we find attractive. The harder you drink this alpha male nonsense, the more screwed up you become. What we regard as an alpha male these days is just someone who stands up for themselves and protects the ones they care about — the best they can, despite the world we live in. She wants someone who believes in something.

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Jerks can be lots of things. They can be cruel but also charming, confident, adventurous, and handsome. This is what attracts her at first — the package. He shows up in the sparkly wrapping paper of a nice guy, or an alpha. See, male jerks tend to show their true colors around other men — but not women. Not at first.

9 places where a good guy can meet a good girl

They hide all their nefarious intentions when they court their ingenue. All those times you got beat up in the locker room where he talked about boofing and grabbing girls by their pussy? Is this how you want to acquire a mate?

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Around women they find attractive, jerks are on their best behavior — in the early stages. The jerkness only reveals itself slowly as he breaks down her self-esteem and makes her dependent on him. But cheer up.

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More and more girls want proof of nice up front. Men see the unfiltered behavior of so-called alpha males. They observe all the toxic masculinity in full display.

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Nice guys often carry the label of beta. What else? All of that sounds great. In a perfect world, every guy would act like this — and no girl would go home with a subhuman scumbag. Give me a beta male any day of the week.

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Not everyone respects themselves, or each other. Some girls are turned on only by big, muscular men who beat the stuffing out of smaller ones for no reason. Some guys only date girls with C-cups. Some people can simply strut into a bar, and waltz out with a threesome in five minutes flat.

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We know how they get twisted around. She wants someone who continues to show respect for her, months and years down the road. She means this:. She wants a guy who can control his emotions and take care of her the same way she takes care of him.

Why women find "bad boys" so attractive, even though we know they're trouble

Girls are just like guys. They want someone they can show their true selves. They want someone who looks at them without all their makeup and conversation tricks. They just want someone they can fall asleep with. Nobody wants to date a passive Borg zombie who always sides with them and never disagrees or asserts themselves. Someone who pretends to go along with everything a woman wants is usually after sex, companionship, and so on….

It makes you another kind of manipulative. They want an equal partner.

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They want someone who disagrees with them, but can have an actual conversation or a debate instead of a shouting match. Women do the same thing sometimes, which is another reason they wind up dating jerks. Bottling yourself up to make someone else happy will make you miserable. Decades ago I listened to pop songs about how opposites attract.

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You are. Use that. Your best bet is always showing your true self. in. Felicia C. Why some women date jerks.

Best dating sites for men: whether you're looking to hook up, find love, or something in between

Jessica Wildfire Follow. Why women date assholes Prevailing thought among single men is that every girl secretly wants to bang some motorcycle gang leader who looks like James Franco and treats us like crap — especially in public, to show their alpha side.

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I Love You Relationships now. Love Dating Relationships Sex Humor. I Love You Follow. Written by Jessica Wildfire Follow.

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